Friday, October 15, 2004

Falafel anyone?

We have figured out why it is that the pollsters don't worry about whether or not they are reaching us cell-phone-only types. Because we're all gonna die of brain tumors apparently. A heartening thought. We recommend an earbud.

The Spinmeister Alert Today Is:
Flaming Fuschia

Here is today's spin: Mary Cheney, daughter of Dick and Lynne, is gay. Yes, she is gay. And it's all John Kerry's fault. Because 7 our of 10 terrorist dentists plan to vote for Kerry. The commiepinko who wants to turn the government into a health care gulag where you will be forced to visit your state senator for medical treatment. Yes, if Kerry had not chosen a trial lawyer for his running mate, then the word lesbian would never have been uttered in the Cheney household.

Kerry shouldn't have brought up the Veep's daughter's sexual orientation. Poor taste. But cheese'an'rice, you would have thought he had suggested everyone eat babies for breakfast from the firestorm afterwards. This only works as an "insult" if being queer is "bad." Which, for those who think being queer is an abomination (in the Biblical sense), it clearly is. Like Alan Keyes, for example, the carpetbagger wingnut the GOP shipped to Illinois to run against Obama Barack. Keyes says that being queer is all about 'selfish hedonism,' and specifically stated the Mary Cheney was by definition a selfish hedonist. The rest of us find a lack of logic here, mostly because the last time we were ever placed in a situation where queer= insult was when Darcy Maunsel told us we were "so gay". In the third grade.

"George W. Bush presents conservatives with a fundamental challenge: Do they believe in anything other than power?" Short answer: No. Long answer? Here.

Looks like Dubya's asking for more UK troops being deployed to the problems areas. Making up for Poland pulling out? Glad there's that "grand coalition". Or maybe he just got sick of hearing Kerry point out the 90% of the casualties are US.

And he's coming down hard on everyone involved with the Abu Ghraib scandal. Lyndie England is going to get court marshaled, but the boss man is getting an extra star. Now that's what we call "taking responsibility." Maybe next he'll promote the guy who was supposed to be keeping an eye on the nuclear facilities. Way to keep those nuclear materials out of the hands of terrorists! (That would be reason number 47 for "why we invaded Iraq". Looks like it's back to the drawing board. Again.) Explains why Iraq is requesting the UN IAEA inspectors come back. The ones the Bush administration said weren't getting the job done. Except that now it seems they were. Until they were pulled out. And the administration "took over." I'm sure there were journalists ready to cover the story, but it seems many of them were too busy being abused. Guess it prevents anyone from meeting with Deep Throat. Speaking of promotions, who's going to be getting one over in the accounting office for the unbalanced Iraq books?

The Bush administration has decided against supporting the UN statement on women's rights. 85 other countries signed on to women's right to an education and health care. Dubya would apparently rather see women in Afghanistan remain uneducated and without access to health care than to see them be able to make decisions on family planning. China, Indonesia and Pakistan signed on. Yes, Pakistan. The Saudis must have been too busy dealing with the spike in terrorism to sign.

O'Reilly claims his desire to combine a love for middle eastern cuisine with phone sex was not sexual harassment. We quote our dear and learned friend, Miss A: "
I am totally grossed out at the falafel as sex toy motif. Falafel is pure innocent love!"

Bush on the economy: Kerry is a tax and spend liberal, which is why we have a record deficit. Black is white. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength...

Worried about election integrity? You should be.

The Christian Coalition has produced a "voter education" guide, which is claims is non-partisan. (Bwah!) "
The guides provide positions on such issues as "unrestricted abortion on demand," "adoption of children by homosexuals," "permanent elimination of the death tax," "federal firearms registration and licensing of gun owners," "affirmative action programs that provide preferential treatment," "allowing younger workers to invest a portion of their Social Security tax in a private account" and several other tax proposals. The only international issue mentioned is "placing U.S. troops under United Nations control." Looks like somebody has been reading those Left Behind books! Oh yes, the United Nations is really Satan's Army, and if you vote for Kerry your son will be forced to fight for The Dark Lord! We'd better pray for the rapture! " Roberta Combs, coalition president, said the guides were an attempt to educate voters and "I don't think the wording is loaded at all." Oh Roberta, are you worried that telling lies will get you 'left behind'?

Golly I'm so glad there is a separation between church and state!

We like the BC04's new slogan.

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