Tuesday, October 19, 2004

The Dictators Weigh In

The Spinmeister Alert Today Is:
Rhubarb

Oh, the spin machine must be spinning and spinning, because people, despite the fact that there are US Generals are saying Baghdad needs another 10,000 police officers (think may be a late addition to yesterday's theme of shortages), the head of Care International's Baghdad office has been kidnapped, and that recent analysis says that the wealth gap between white families and black and Hispanic families has grown, we're still hearing all about Mary Cheney. You would think that Kerry had said the woman has sex with goats for money the way these people are carrying on. Is anyone paying attention to the fact that Brent Scowcroft, the national security advisor under Poppy Bush, has made public note of the son's shortfalls in the foreign policy area? Well he did. Bush camp response? Dick Cheney again said that a Kerry election would result in "terrorists bombing US cities." This just a day after Bush said Kerry was using "shameless scare tactics" in his campaign speeches. Golly, if saying "elect my opponent and die" isn't a shameless scare tactic, we're kind of afraid of what a shameless scare tactic would look like. Does he think Kerry kills a kitten on stage and then says 'vote for me or the dog gets it next'?

Meanwhile Sinclair broadcasting has fired their Washington bureau chief for voicing a criticism of their decision to broadcast the anti-Kerry sock-you-mentary, "Stolen Honor: Wounds That Never Heal". (Which maybe should be retitled: Lost Sanity: The Grudge that can never be Let Go) Glad to see that "media" outlets are being run like BC04 campaign rallies. Guess he must be giving succor to the enemy, as they say. Who needs the First Amendment when we can have Dubya?

Oh yes, and Bush has gained a new supporter- Putin has weighed in as a Dubya man for the election. Too bad the polls in Moscow seem to be closed. Especially if you want democratic polls that allow you to vote for governor. It's good to see the world's dictators out there, getting into the swing of things. We wonder how the rest of the dictators will fall out between now and Nov. 2nd. Gaddhafi? Probably pro-Bush- after all, Dubya keeps touting the Libyan strongman 's re-entry into the market system as a Dubya 'win' so why shouldn't Mohmar? Burma's General Than Shwe? Well, the General's a real with-us-or-against-us kinda guy, so we figure they might see eye to eye on some things. Besides, BC04 sent some much needed (especially with the embargo!) cash flowing the way of the Orwellian military dictatorship when they had some Made in Burma campaign gear made up. But Kim Jong Il- that's all Nader/Camejo, baby.

And please, the voter registration shenanigans have just got to stop. Problems with destroyed Democratic registration applications in Oregon and Nevada, while Ohio has crackheads registering Mary Poppins. Don't these idiots realize that Julie Andrews is British? Seriously, this is just disgusting. Is this Nigeria? Is this Cambodia? Is this Haiti? One stolen election andthis is what our democracy has come to? Partisan disenfranchisement and crackheads registering imaginary characters? Thank you, to the Commander in Thief, for showing us that our democracy is, in fact, a house of fucking cards. It must be heartening in Zimbabwe to know that we have something in common.

By the way, if you have the sinking feeling that your neighbors, co-workers, friends and acquaintences might not have that good of a handle on the issues of the campaign, well, you're right. We're betting that Tennessee is probably representative. Hap tip to The Votemaster for this one.

In response to Jon Stewart pointing out that the Crossfire crew are partisan hacks who refuse to actually engage in discourse or provide useful information to the people who watch their show while still pretending to have a useful role, James Carville said yesterday that Stewart was a "pompous ass" for attacking Ted Koppel. We assume we missed that part of the interview, though we think it's curious that "Ted Koppel" appears nowhere in the transcript from last Friday's show. We think James Carville is a pompous ass in general for being on Crossfire. Robert Novak noted that he didn't think Stewart was funny, but that he did think he was uninformed. It's funny, because we think Jon Stewart is hilarious and obviously well informed. But then again, we also think Robert Novak is an asshole. We also think that The Poor Man has inaugurated the best title for Tucker Carlson, besting even Stewart's "big dick" call. We are still chuckling.

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